So, I finally decided to give my boss my two weeks and quit my job for the summer. I went through my whole conversation with her in my head all the way to work. I knew I had three hours after I got to work until she got in. I also knew that today was inventory day, our district manager was going to be there all day and that the day might be too crazy to break the news to her. I was prepared to wait until tomorrow. THEN, I got to work, looked at the schedule for next week and my whole idea of quitting my job changed! I only work 11.5 hours next week. I got to thinking...if she kept my hours close to that, then that would be a little extra income, I'd be able to do the things I want to do this summer and I wouldn't have to quit. UGH. Now I'm back to square one.
Have I mentioned that I hate the color gray. You know, not black and not white, but the color you get when you mix the two...the color in between. Just like making a decion and not having a solid answer as to which way to go. The answer to my decision is...mud!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Summer is in the air
I am enjoying my day off. Probably because I know that I have tomorrow off also. Which is really confirming my thoughts on quiting my job for the summer to be home with my kids. I had so much on my list of to-dos for the day. We had a little bit of a detour getting to the grocery store though. How could I say no to friends asking me to hang out at the outlet mall with them. (and hold and snuggle Soli, my 11 month old friend, while doing this!) The weather is great, the company was even greater and now home to finish cleaning the house. Then off to Chick Fil A to support my teen friends going to Germany and then off to the ball field to watch the bestest church team ever play some softball! Some times you have to really search for God's answers, and sometimes He lays them at your feet. Love Him so!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
WoRk
Not exactly sure how I feel about this word. Is it a bad word? Some days, yes! Is it something I enjoy? Most days, yes. Is it something God threw at me in Novemeber and I didn't realize what a blessing it would become in the months to follow? Absolutely. So now as I type, I'm trying to make the decision to continue working or to spend my summer being at home with my three amazing kids. I hate big decisions like this. I know that it would really help us get caught back up on things since Jason was out of a job for many months. It would also supply extra income for our sons to be able to play football like they've been wanting to do and our daughter to go to California this summer and have a little extra vacation money. And for my friend and I to take the road trip that we want to take in July.
I hate hard decisions. I've been that way since I was little. If you ask my mom, she would agree whole-heartedly. From the time I was little I had a hard time deciding which color shirt to buy, or what to order at a restaraunt, etc.
I'm a grown-up now. I have to make grown-up decisions. Like whether it's best to work and make some extra income or to be home for my kids. Do I really have to grow up?
I hate hard decisions. I've been that way since I was little. If you ask my mom, she would agree whole-heartedly. From the time I was little I had a hard time deciding which color shirt to buy, or what to order at a restaraunt, etc.
I'm a grown-up now. I have to make grown-up decisions. Like whether it's best to work and make some extra income or to be home for my kids. Do I really have to grow up?
Monday, March 8, 2010
God's Judgement
I know, I have talked about this before. I guess you could say, I am very passionate about this topic. I just finished reading Romans 2 (God's Righteous Judgement)
This past week and this coming week, some friends of ours are going thru a really tough time, watching as their son is in court for some legal trouble he got into. As I sat in the courtroom and wondered what the jury would come back with, I thought a lot about God's judgement. After all, that is all that matters in the end.
Then last night I spoke with some other friends who were thinking of getting a tattoo but were worried about being judged by people in our church.
I even dealt with this subject about a month ago when my 14 year old daughter asked if she could get her nose pierced. I personally think it's adorable and wanted to immediately say "YES". But then all these thoughts came into my head about what people would think, not necessarily of her for having it, but about me for allowing this. I got angry. And even started to argue with those people in my head. Then, I said, "YES" and we went. As I study the scriptures on tattoos and piercings I see both sides.
One question: Do you have your ears pierced? Where does it say that it's okay to pierce your ears and not your nose? Where does it say it's okay for a female to pierce their ears and not a male?
I am just as guilty as the next person. I find myself judging others for the way they act, dress, speak, etc. But the question we need to ask ourselves is, "is it a biblical reason we are choosing to judge,(although in Romans 2 and other places in the bible it says that God is our judge, not man) or is it a personal preference that we personally don't like?" If it's the latter, be like Jesus, and love that person whether he/she has a large tattoo on their arm, wearing clothes you don't like, has a pieced tougue, etc.
Jesus replied, " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Matthew 22:37-39
This past week and this coming week, some friends of ours are going thru a really tough time, watching as their son is in court for some legal trouble he got into. As I sat in the courtroom and wondered what the jury would come back with, I thought a lot about God's judgement. After all, that is all that matters in the end.
Then last night I spoke with some other friends who were thinking of getting a tattoo but were worried about being judged by people in our church.
I even dealt with this subject about a month ago when my 14 year old daughter asked if she could get her nose pierced. I personally think it's adorable and wanted to immediately say "YES". But then all these thoughts came into my head about what people would think, not necessarily of her for having it, but about me for allowing this. I got angry. And even started to argue with those people in my head. Then, I said, "YES" and we went. As I study the scriptures on tattoos and piercings I see both sides.
One question: Do you have your ears pierced? Where does it say that it's okay to pierce your ears and not your nose? Where does it say it's okay for a female to pierce their ears and not a male?
I am just as guilty as the next person. I find myself judging others for the way they act, dress, speak, etc. But the question we need to ask ourselves is, "is it a biblical reason we are choosing to judge,(although in Romans 2 and other places in the bible it says that God is our judge, not man) or is it a personal preference that we personally don't like?" If it's the latter, be like Jesus, and love that person whether he/she has a large tattoo on their arm, wearing clothes you don't like, has a pieced tougue, etc.
Jesus replied, " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Matthew 22:37-39
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Some Advice
I just wanted to give some advice to those of you who don't know what to say to those of us that are going through tough times. I realize now, that before I was in the situation of having my husband lose his job, I was a bad friend. We have several friends who are in the same situation as us. I never knew what to do for them, what to say, or how to help. Now that I'm going through this, I've realized a few things. I've come up with a few things that I wish I would have known, but now now all too well.
1. DO NOT ask that person how they are doing. Times are hard, and most likely they aren't doing great. And unless you truly care how they are doing, and want to be there to listen, don't ask. And if you do ask, be prepared to hear the words, "Not good." and then follow up. Just a hello and/or a hug is great. Or let them know you are praying for them, but mean it if you say it.
2. DO NOT say, "let me know if there's anything I can do." There is LOTS that you can do, but most people aren't going to ask. So again, unless you truly mean that you want to help, don't say that either. (I've been the one saying this!) Instead, just do! When someone doesn't have an income, or much of one, there is lots you can do. There are groceries that need to be bought, bills that need to be paid, gas in vehicles, prayers that need to be prayed, even just a simple gesture of bringing a meal to the family, or every day products such as toilet paper, dish soup, laundry soap, etc. Gift cards are another great option. These are always welcome and help very much! Simple every day things are wonderful to those with little or no money to buy them. (PLEASE do not think I am writing to ask for these things, I'm just trying to explain that most people won't ask or don't know how to ask for help. It's a very humbling experience for those of us going through this and it means a lot for someone to take that extra step and just do, instead of just ask.) Prayers are huge! I AM asking for your prayers, for all of those people without jobs right now.
It's amazing to see that God's love shines through those that know Him and love Him. I thank all of our friends and family who have been there for us, with a hug, with a meal, etc. I can't imagine going through this without knowing God, and without amazing brothers and sisters in Christ.
The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all
Psalm 34:17-19
1. DO NOT ask that person how they are doing. Times are hard, and most likely they aren't doing great. And unless you truly care how they are doing, and want to be there to listen, don't ask. And if you do ask, be prepared to hear the words, "Not good." and then follow up. Just a hello and/or a hug is great. Or let them know you are praying for them, but mean it if you say it.
2. DO NOT say, "let me know if there's anything I can do." There is LOTS that you can do, but most people aren't going to ask. So again, unless you truly mean that you want to help, don't say that either. (I've been the one saying this!) Instead, just do! When someone doesn't have an income, or much of one, there is lots you can do. There are groceries that need to be bought, bills that need to be paid, gas in vehicles, prayers that need to be prayed, even just a simple gesture of bringing a meal to the family, or every day products such as toilet paper, dish soup, laundry soap, etc. Gift cards are another great option. These are always welcome and help very much! Simple every day things are wonderful to those with little or no money to buy them. (PLEASE do not think I am writing to ask for these things, I'm just trying to explain that most people won't ask or don't know how to ask for help. It's a very humbling experience for those of us going through this and it means a lot for someone to take that extra step and just do, instead of just ask.) Prayers are huge! I AM asking for your prayers, for all of those people without jobs right now.
It's amazing to see that God's love shines through those that know Him and love Him. I thank all of our friends and family who have been there for us, with a hug, with a meal, etc. I can't imagine going through this without knowing God, and without amazing brothers and sisters in Christ.
The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all
Psalm 34:17-19
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
You've Gotta Face the Clouds, To Find the Silver Lining
I usually get inspired to write on my blog by things that are happening in my life, or things that I am passionate about.
Well, I guess you can say I am inspired. Right now, a big, dark cloud is hanging over our lives.
Wednesday, Dec. 9th, our lives changed forever. It's funny how you just go along living life and really don't think about it. Until something happens to stop you in your tracks.
Jason lost his job. First there is shock. I was speechless. I had no words to say. Many things were going through my mind. Are we going to have to move? We're going to have to take all our kids' Christmas presents back. Why is God doing this to us? Why at Christmas time? Why? Why? Why? Right now, I really don't have an answer to any of those questions....except the one about taking Christmas presents back. Friday morning, Jason and I dug out the presents, found receipts and headed to the stores where we had visited only the week before. What a humbling, horrific, sad day.
I remember last year standing in line at Wal-Mart to return something a week before Christmas and the lady in front of me was returning all the toys she had bought her kids and hearing her reply when the clerk asked her if anything was wrong with any of it, she said, "no, my husband just lost his job." My heart sank and I wanted to buy everything she returned and put it right back in her cart...for her to take home. Never in a million years did I think that lady would be me, this year.
Then there is anger. Anger at the company that hired Jason just 9 months earlier and then let him go...three weeks before Christmas. This was supposed to be a Christian company. They will be sitting by the fire on Christmas Eve opening lots of presents (oh, probably after they get in their private jet and fly to their vacation home in Aspen) with lots of food and laughter and not a thought of us, with our kids having no presents under the tree to open, and wondering if we should turn our furnace down one more degree because we won't be able to afford to pay it when the bill comes.
Then there is total, no-words-to-describe sadness that hits, more often than not. Just looking at my kids. Thinking of our amazing friends here that we could possibly be leaving in the near future, hearing Christmas music, watching the commercials that talk about buying gifts, hearing my customers say, "have a great day" or "Merry Christmas". Can I tell you, I've wanted to snap back at them and say, "Whatever!" or "yeah, right!"
There is panic. There is frustration. There is bitterness.
There is also small glimpses of hope. When I think about all the things that anger me, especially the whole "Christmas thing" I try to stop and remember that giving gifts is not what Christmas is about. It's about Jesus. Being born in a cave, surrounded by animals.
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him John 3:17
This is the most amazing gift of all. Anyone who believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life! John 3:16b The gift of heaven, with Him!
I had turned on the music at work the other day, and for the first time, really listened to the words of the song by Steven Curtis Chapman called Christmas is all in the Heart.
No, it's not in the snow that may or may not fall,
And it's not in the gifts around the tree
It's in the love heaven gave, the night our Savior came,
And that same love can still be found wherever you are,
'Cause Christmas is all in the heart -
It hit me like a ton of bricks and right then I decided I needed to make this Christmas special for my kids, even if we don't have gifts under the tree. We have each other. We are all healthy. We have amazing friends that we get to celebrate Jesus' birth with.
I just finished baking sugar cookies. A Christmas tradition I've been doing since our oldest son was one year old.
Hope is also found in the words of Matthew 6:
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
I am still very sad, very angry, very tired, very frustrated by our circumstances, but I know that God is good, and still works miracles every day. I will continue to look toward Heaven and trust in Jesus no matter what we are going through.
If you are reading this, and don't have a personal relationship with Jesus and don't know for sure you are going to Heaven, please think about it. It's a free gift! All you have to do is trust in Jesus, give your life to Him. Follow Him. It's not about being "religious". It's about giving your life to Him, who gave everything for you, died for YOU, so that you can live for eternity, in Heaven.
THANK YOU, GOD, for the PERFECT gift of your son this Christmas!
Well, I guess you can say I am inspired. Right now, a big, dark cloud is hanging over our lives.
Wednesday, Dec. 9th, our lives changed forever. It's funny how you just go along living life and really don't think about it. Until something happens to stop you in your tracks.
Jason lost his job. First there is shock. I was speechless. I had no words to say. Many things were going through my mind. Are we going to have to move? We're going to have to take all our kids' Christmas presents back. Why is God doing this to us? Why at Christmas time? Why? Why? Why? Right now, I really don't have an answer to any of those questions....except the one about taking Christmas presents back. Friday morning, Jason and I dug out the presents, found receipts and headed to the stores where we had visited only the week before. What a humbling, horrific, sad day.
I remember last year standing in line at Wal-Mart to return something a week before Christmas and the lady in front of me was returning all the toys she had bought her kids and hearing her reply when the clerk asked her if anything was wrong with any of it, she said, "no, my husband just lost his job." My heart sank and I wanted to buy everything she returned and put it right back in her cart...for her to take home. Never in a million years did I think that lady would be me, this year.
Then there is anger. Anger at the company that hired Jason just 9 months earlier and then let him go...three weeks before Christmas. This was supposed to be a Christian company. They will be sitting by the fire on Christmas Eve opening lots of presents (oh, probably after they get in their private jet and fly to their vacation home in Aspen) with lots of food and laughter and not a thought of us, with our kids having no presents under the tree to open, and wondering if we should turn our furnace down one more degree because we won't be able to afford to pay it when the bill comes.
Then there is total, no-words-to-describe sadness that hits, more often than not. Just looking at my kids. Thinking of our amazing friends here that we could possibly be leaving in the near future, hearing Christmas music, watching the commercials that talk about buying gifts, hearing my customers say, "have a great day" or "Merry Christmas". Can I tell you, I've wanted to snap back at them and say, "Whatever!" or "yeah, right!"
There is panic. There is frustration. There is bitterness.
There is also small glimpses of hope. When I think about all the things that anger me, especially the whole "Christmas thing" I try to stop and remember that giving gifts is not what Christmas is about. It's about Jesus. Being born in a cave, surrounded by animals.
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him John 3:17
This is the most amazing gift of all. Anyone who believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life! John 3:16b The gift of heaven, with Him!
I had turned on the music at work the other day, and for the first time, really listened to the words of the song by Steven Curtis Chapman called Christmas is all in the Heart.
No, it's not in the snow that may or may not fall,
And it's not in the gifts around the tree
It's in the love heaven gave, the night our Savior came,
And that same love can still be found wherever you are,
'Cause Christmas is all in the heart -
It hit me like a ton of bricks and right then I decided I needed to make this Christmas special for my kids, even if we don't have gifts under the tree. We have each other. We are all healthy. We have amazing friends that we get to celebrate Jesus' birth with.
I just finished baking sugar cookies. A Christmas tradition I've been doing since our oldest son was one year old.
Hope is also found in the words of Matthew 6:
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
I am still very sad, very angry, very tired, very frustrated by our circumstances, but I know that God is good, and still works miracles every day. I will continue to look toward Heaven and trust in Jesus no matter what we are going through.
If you are reading this, and don't have a personal relationship with Jesus and don't know for sure you are going to Heaven, please think about it. It's a free gift! All you have to do is trust in Jesus, give your life to Him. Follow Him. It's not about being "religious". It's about giving your life to Him, who gave everything for you, died for YOU, so that you can live for eternity, in Heaven.
THANK YOU, GOD, for the PERFECT gift of your son this Christmas!
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Gifts from God
As Christmas approaches we think of bright lights decorating the trees, shoppers out getting their last minutes bargains, cookie exchanges, Christmas parties, and wonderfully wrapped gifts under the tree.
When we think of gifts, most of us think of brightly wrapped boxes with big bows on top. I have to admit, I enjoy getting the beautifully wrapped gift almost as much as I enjoy opening it and seeing what's inside.
Some gifts are not beautifully wrapped. In fact, some are disguised in ugly wrapping, or no wrapping at all. I received one of these gifts about two weeks ago. I won't go into a lot of detail, because this was MY gift from God. Let's just say, when I "received" this gift, I was really bummed, did not want this gift at all, and down right frustrated about it.
As I think back on the past two weeks, my life has been very, very busy, but the deep dark valley that I was walking in seems to have some SON shine shining on it. This gift has been a blessing to me as I finally get a glimpse of what God intended with it.
As Thanksgiving has come and gone, have you stopped being thankful for the things (gifts) He has provided? Although we don't see the big picture, God does. He is in charge. "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," declares the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9.
So, this Christmas, remember that not all gifts are beautifully wrapped. They may arrive as an unwanted "speed bump" in your life. But God has the whole picture planned out....so climb up into His lap and trust in Him.
Also, remember that our most precious gift of all, hung on a cross, bloody, beaten and battered for us! Celebrate His birth this Christmas, but also remember the gift of the cross!
MERRY CHRISTMAS to my wonderful friends! I love you all!
When we think of gifts, most of us think of brightly wrapped boxes with big bows on top. I have to admit, I enjoy getting the beautifully wrapped gift almost as much as I enjoy opening it and seeing what's inside.
Some gifts are not beautifully wrapped. In fact, some are disguised in ugly wrapping, or no wrapping at all. I received one of these gifts about two weeks ago. I won't go into a lot of detail, because this was MY gift from God. Let's just say, when I "received" this gift, I was really bummed, did not want this gift at all, and down right frustrated about it.
As I think back on the past two weeks, my life has been very, very busy, but the deep dark valley that I was walking in seems to have some SON shine shining on it. This gift has been a blessing to me as I finally get a glimpse of what God intended with it.
As Thanksgiving has come and gone, have you stopped being thankful for the things (gifts) He has provided? Although we don't see the big picture, God does. He is in charge. "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," declares the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9.
So, this Christmas, remember that not all gifts are beautifully wrapped. They may arrive as an unwanted "speed bump" in your life. But God has the whole picture planned out....so climb up into His lap and trust in Him.
Also, remember that our most precious gift of all, hung on a cross, bloody, beaten and battered for us! Celebrate His birth this Christmas, but also remember the gift of the cross!
MERRY CHRISTMAS to my wonderful friends! I love you all!
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